messy. crazy. amazing. joyful.

We're not all officially ADHD. Dad's unofficial. Our ten-year-old twins have ADHD. Our seven-year old wants to have it because everyone is always talking about it. Our three year old has ADHD--just because she's three. And me, Mom, I think it's contagious. Who can remain untouched in a house where shoes seem to be lost every morning, instructions are routinely thrown aside, and fights erupt over which continent capybaras come from?

Wednesday, March 13, 2013

"No" on the Letter and Buzz, A Must Read

Lots of energy in our house.

Well, the principal and teacher do not want to pass along our letter to parents of children in Luke’s class because they feel it would “add fuel to the fire.” Some parents have actually complained about having Luke in the class and want him out. I’m not sure whether they are saying that Luke is disruptive or aggressive, but I don’t see either one as being an overarching problem in the classroom. Yes, I understand it might take time to deal with Luke, but it takes time to help a child who is struggling with reading or a child who is hearing impaired. Should we kick them all out? We wouldn’t have a class left.

So the principal told me that this letter would just make other parents more concerned that their children were being deprived, and that they wouldn’t care about my son’s rights to appropriate education. I really didn’t know what to say after that, so I just left it. I could find the class parents and deliver the letters on my own, I guess. Not sure what we’ll do next.

Next subject. I am reading the book, Buzz: A Year of Paying Attention by Katherine Ellison. “A hilarious and heartrending account of one mother’s journey to understand and reconnect with her high-spirited preteen son—a true story sure to beguile parents grappling with a child’s bewildering behavior.” –from Amazon

The mother and son are both dealing with ADHD, and I love Ellison’s honest and funny take on their life. And she explores every avenue of ADHD treatment that I’ve ever wanted to look into. I’ll let her visit Dr. Daniel Amen and get a brain scan so I don’t have to—unless she says it was worth it.

The book is fabulous. I read a review of it a while ago that wasn’t particularly glowing, so I didn’t rush out and get it, but I’ll tell you to rush out and get it. It may be that I relate well to their situation, but I think anyone dealing with ADHD can find some gems of wisdom and black comedy in there.

For instance, Ellison has a little epiphany about how her son’s behavior is exacerbated by his own stress and is not just a ploy to destroy her sanity—something I have to remind myself over and over again:

“Suddenly, he’s no longer my persecutor, the rebel lashing out against a weakened foe, the spoiled symbol of everything that’s going wrong with American youth, the painfully public proof of how Jack [her husband] and I have screwed up as parents.
“He’s just nine years old. He’s getting scolded at home, and teased, rejected, and reprimanded every single day at school. His mother is unhappy, her behavior erratic….
“On top of all this, he has just learned that he has something wrong with his brain.
“He’s scared. And he’s calling 9-1-1 for help.”

Do you relate?

1 comment:

  1. It's now 4 am as I'm reading your blog.. I'll probably read more of it tomorrow. I woke up thinking about my son's headaches earlier, and what the Intuniv is also doing in terms of weight to his little body.. just had me so concerned that I was googling these types of symptoms and came across your blog. I have often thought of writing a letter similar to yours. My aunt actually went to her son's school and spoke with the kids in their class about Autism. My son is high functioning (the psychiatrist thinks the more correct label is Aspergers, but I'm not sure. My kiddo is currently undergoing redetermination from the County, to see whether or not he still fits the original Autism diagnosis). His school had become such a nightmare for us this year that I opted to homeschool until June. He'll be transferring in the Fall. I just couldn't sit by and watch him deal with these people. More and more, he was out of the classroom for behavior issues than actually learning anything. So many stories like ours - and yours - that it makes me want to cry.